Dear Anonymous Commenter Who Was Offended By My Marching Band Comment:
Well, whoever you are, you go to my school. Would you like to know a story? Once, I was in love with the marching band. The drumline. Or, to be more specific, a drummer. But it didn't work out and I got my heart broken.
I've seen field shows by AF's marching band a thousand times. They're fantastic. Am I instantly in love? No. I don't even believe in instant love. I sort of don't even believe in love. (That's a total lie. I certainly believe in love. I'm just scared to death by it.) No, I did not fall instantly in love with that boy at the dance. I've known him for several months and loved him slowly since.
I'm terribly sorry. I know AF's marching band is fantastic and I am terribly sorry to offend you. I didn't mean it. It was a generalization that I put in for literary purposes. In normal high schools (but what is normal, even?), marching band isn't worshipped.
But, at the end of the day, it's sometimes nice to watch your football team win. Or your basketball team.
So, please excuse my stereotypical generalization. It was for literary use only (much like hyperboles).
All my love, Addy.
P.S. Do I know you in real life?